Giant Rabbit Found Dead on United Airlines Flight

Understanding Power - The Indispensible Chomsky

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Wednesday, 26 April 2017

quote [ Simon was expected to become the world's biggest rabbit ]

Hits keep on comin'

[SFW] [travel]	[+1 Sad]
[by XregnaR@1:27pmGMT]

Comments

Dienes said @ 1:50pm GMT on 26th Apr

No shit it died. The cargo hold is no place for animals, despite what the airlines would have you believe. Its loud, dark, and cold as fuck. Poor thing probably panicked to death.

If you can't personally book a ticket for the animal, find a flight attendant. When we got our sphynx, we paid a flight attendant $60 to bring the kitten with her - She was fawned over in first class instead of shoved in a crate in cargo hold at 50 degrees F. Way cheaper than buying a ticket and way safer than cargo.

XregnaR said @ 2:47pm GMT on 26th Apr

International travel is a serious PITA when you add animals in to the loop. If this flight attendant thing works with taking our dogs to the UK, I will find you and I will buy you a delicious meal.

Dienes said @ 2:14am GMT on 27th Apr

My buddy got his animals listed as "emotional support therapy dogs."

This is a grueling process that consists of filling out a form with your address and the dog name and breed, and paying $100. Now they fly with my buddy in the cabin for free.

Use that information as you will.

cb361 said^[1] @ 2:59pm GMT on 26th Apr

United Airlines are elil, all right.

Abdul Alhazred said @ 3:04pm GMT on 26th Apr

Rabbits are prone to stress-induced heart attacks, so it's no wonder this beast died in the cargo hold. Hell, if you yell boo to them they're likely to die.

Hugh E. said @ 4:35pm GMT on 26th Apr

"Now, I'm going to tell you a little story today. It's a heartbreakingly sad story about a young man whose life was completely destroyed by these instruments of fear. A young man, searching for love in all the wrong places. His name was Frank."
- Donnie Darko

mechanical contrivance said @ 5:43pm GMT on 26th Apr

"This is no ordinary lamp! It once changed the course of a young man's life. A young man, who like this lamp, was more than what he seemed: a diamond in the rough."
- Aladdin

Headlessfriar said @ 8:10pm GMT on 26th Apr

Reveal

Did I ever tell you about the man who taught his asshole to talk? His whole abdomen would move up and down you dig farting out the words. It was unlike anything I ever heard.

This ass talk had sort of a gut frequency. It hit you right down there like you gotta go. You know when the old colon gives you the elbow and it feels sorta cold inside, and you know all you have to do is turn loose? Well this talking hit you right down there, a bubbly, thick stagnant sound, a sound you could smell.

This man worked for a carnival you dig, and to start with it was like a novelty ventriliquist act. Real funny, too, at first. He had a number he called “The Better ‘Ole” that was a scream, I tell you. I forget most of it but it was clever. Like, “Oh I say, are you still down there, old thing?”

“Nah I had to go relieve myself.”

After a while the ass start talking on its own. He would go in without anything prepared and his ass would ad-lib and toss the gags back at him every time.

Then it developed sort of teeth-like little raspy in-curving hooks and started eating. He thought this was cute at first and built an act around it, but the asshole would eat its way through his pants and start talking on the street, shouting out it wanted equal rights. It would get drunk, too, and have crying jags nobody loved it and it wanted to be kissed same as any other mouth. Finally it talked all the time day and night, you could hear him for blocks screaming at it to shut up, and beating it with his fist, and sticking candles up it, but nothing did any good and the asshole said to him: “It’s you who will shut up in the end. Not me. Because we dont need you around here any more. I can talk and eat and shit.”

After that he began waking up in the morning with a transparent jelly like a tadpole’s tail all over his mouth. This jelly was what the scientists call un-D.T., Undifferentiated Tissue, which can grow into any kind of flesh on the human body. He would tear it off his mouth and the pieces would stick to his hands like burning gasoline jelly and grow there, grow anywhere on him a glob of it fell. So finally his mouth sealed over, and the whole head would have have amputated spontaneous — (did you know there is a condition occurs in parts of Africa and only among Negroes where the little toe amputates spontaneously?) — except for the eyes you dig. Thats one thing the asshole couldn’t do was see. It needed the eyes. But nerve connections were blocked and infiltrated and atrophied so the brain couldn’t give orders any more. It was trapped in the skull, sealed off. For a while you could see the silent, helpless suffering of the brain behind the eyes, then finally the brain must have died, because the eyes went out, and there was no more feeling in them than a crab’s eyes on the end of a stalk.

-Naked Lunch

1	ScoobySnacks
2	HoZay
3	Paracetamol
4	lilmookieesquire
5	Ankylosaur