Holy shit! SE is back! Thank you to who ever did this.

I figure now is as good a time as any to update my handle. schatten00777 hasn't been used outside of SE since 2002.

huh. should probably do the same...

Done! wow I made v0idmagus back in college...good bye old username, you were kinda crap.

Same, schatten was from my freshman year of college, when I was all dark and brooding. Or at least thought I was.

I know what you mean.

Steele worked his dark magics.

I shall have you know the handle lilmookieesquire lives eternal.

http://www.sensibleendowment.com/entry.php/14

Since I can't really crow about this on stupid facebook, I have to mention that I am having so much awesome sex right now with a redheaded little minx.

?

congratulations?

Congratulations! It's not twins, though, is it?

Worst sex I ever had was with a brunette who wanted to be a redhead and dyed her hair.

Best I've ever had has been with the cute, slender redhead who I'm planning on giving a ring to as soon as I can (*&%ing afford one.

... not sure how the first part's really relevant, but I'm totally with you on that redheaded little minx thing.

Smut-fic writers could also make note of this. A nice good smutlet with plenty of hedonic descriptions, avoiding both purple prose and Ikea erotica, is just what I'd like to read now. I'm terrible at finding them. Even most of the Clitorides nominees I've clicked lately I have found lacking.

Here's one I wrote more than ten years ago, and have no doubt cited on SE before. Maybe a bit too much setting the emotional context and too little sex, in retrospect.

Make a sequel, and yes, make the subtitle The Second Coming.

Yes!

I enjoy a good bit of purple-headed prose myself.

Never thought I'd have a chance to really opine on this subject...

As a guy I have found that some thrusting works better than others. In particular, when you get her legs over your shoulders and thrust deep, you want to move slightly downward so that the tip if your cock is aimed a bit south of her navel. You're inside her, but aimed in such a way that every thrust rubs against the front wall. This is where the g-spot is, and more often than not it's quite reactive. Sometimes she will squirt, sometimes not, but she will usually go straight into massive orgasms from this.

Combined with the rubbing of her clit against your man fur she'll go out of orbit.

I'm a practitioner of the fine art of penis thrusting, Dong-Fu.

Your Dong-fu is no match for my Taekwondong

Then I counter with Brazilian Ju-Dick-su!

Your Ju-Dick-su is no match for my Cockoeira!

Don't forget Jeet-Kunt-Do!

I think I'll stick with fapap and wankration. And they are indeed sticky.

As is Spanking Monkey style.

Most of the women I've been with tend to enjoy the slow/work your way up to fast style.
Of course, going down on her beforehand can make the whole thing way more enjoyable no matter what kind of thrusting you do.

No, no, no: Thrust quickly, get it over with! Never subject a poor woman to an extended bout of sex where she might even suffer convulsions or other signs of demonic possession!

Dude, you've clearly never experience sex with a woman in the throes of demonic possession.

There are certain sexual activities during which you definitely don't want your partner's head swiveling around 360 degrees. Just sayin'.

Then explain the blood!

Speaking of convulsions, does anyone else get freaked out by the spazmatic (autocorroect tried to change this to spermatic, which I thought was funny) moves by female porn stars of the 70s/early 80s? It's just as bad as the fake vocalizations of pleasure in modern porn, but no one ever mentions it. Also, it's weird that although there were rarely shaved performers back then (I mean, at least clean up around the thigh crease--jesus, there were occasionally shaving scenes that implied that a bald vag is all anyone would ever want. I wasn't alive back then, so I don't understand these idiosyncrasies of the time.

Heh. I guess you can't mod and post at the same time reliably yet. Was supposed to be a +1 interesting mod. :)

I fixed this for you

Muchos gracias.

We must we must we must
We must adjust our thrust